FlytrapCare Carnivorous Plant Forums

That sucks! My parents let me keep all of my plants in my room, so from what I've learned, tell him you spent your money on it and don't want to waste that money, you could also tell him, it will help with pests, like flies spiders etc. Also make sure he knows it won't be in his way and he won't even have to worry about it, I hope this helps, if you still can't keep it inside, you could buy a heat lamp and keep it in your garage, a heater would work too.

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Having been on both sides of this dilemma, you're kinda out of luck. Dads house, dads rules.
On the one hand, you spent your money on a plant. But how many plants do you have in the house? Are you caring for them? Are they in your room or spread around the house?
On the other hand, you're taking liberties where you should probably be asking permission first from the guy who's paying the bills in the house.
Rather than whine to him about how mean he is, how unreasonable he is, and how it will die, negotiate. "If I keep my room clean," or "If I do the dishes every night," maybe "If I clean the bathroom every week, can I keep it inside, in my room?"
Instead of arguing with him, earn it. Show him you're willing to work for the privilege of keeping the plant indoors.

Sorry to hear about the situation but there is a possible way to lessen the pain.
Drosera burmannii are a quick growing annual.
Grab a pack of seeds from the FTS seed bank and plant them next Spring.
They'll germinate, grow, mature, flower, and set seeds, all in one season.
This way you can keep the cycle going.
When you're in your own place, you can set up an indoor growing area and grow what you want where you want.

Good growing,
Mike

ChefDean wrote:Having been on both sides of this dilemma, you're kinda out of luck. Dads house, dads rules.
On the one hand, you spent your money on a plant. But how many plants do you have in the house? Are you caring for them? Are they in your room or spread around the house?
On the other hand, you're taking liberties where you should probably be asking permission first from the guy who's paying the bills in the house.
Rather than whine to him about how mean he is, how unreasonable he is, and how it will die, negotiate. "If I keep my room clean," or "If I do the dishes every night," maybe "If I clean the bathroom every week, can I keep it inside, in my room?"
Instead of arguing with him, earn it. Show him you're willing to work for the privilege of keeping the plant indoors.

I agree, if he won't let you have it inside try to negotiate, tell him you're sorry first, and say you understand his arguments, and try to reason with him, if he still says no, say okay, and do what the other person said, get some seeds from the seed bank and grow it as an annual.

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Joshuamarshall792 wrote:Here is the funny thing right after I came back in he was already in bed! And I put my sundew in a cooler! Btw Mike.... It already has flower buds...

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Let him sleep and talk to him tomorrow.

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If you are old enough just fight him to assert dominance.

SundewWolf wrote:If you are old enough just fight him to assert dominance.

Good idea, however I do not believe OP is a wolf.

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Assert dominance lmfao. Honestly though Joshua, it's one of the first and best lessons you learn in your adult life. Learn to play the game. At the end of the day, it is your dad's house and he can decide what he wants going on inside of it. When you have your own, you'll be able to make your own rules. It's hard to say without actually knowing what happened and the dynamic there, but I agree with everyone else. You could always try to negotiate. You have other plants, find a way to grow the drosera in the same place. If it is important to you, make a sacrifice and do something for your dad or home like chores to show you are serious. If you're not taking care of the plants or they're scattered everywhere, I can see why he wouldn't want another one taking up space. Get the stuff organized and work with your dad. His job is to teach you things you need to learn/know in life. We don't know why he said no or what the motivations are.

As was mentioned earlier as well, they naturally go through their life cycle in a year and you can grow them when the season is suited for it if nothing else. The ones that last longer are in good conditions with regular feeding/maintenance.

Apollyon wrote:Assert dominance lmfao. Honestly though Joshua, it's one of the first and best lessons you learn in your adult life. Learn to play the game. At the end of the day, it is your dad's house and he can decide what he wants going on inside of it. When you have your own, you'll be able to make your own rules. It's hard to say without actually knowing what happened and the dynamic there, but I agree with everyone else. You could always try to negotiate. You have other plants, find a way to grow the drosera in the same place. If it is important to you, make a sacrifice and do something for your dad or home like chores to show you are serious. If you're not taking care of the plants or they're scattered everywhere, I can see why he wouldn't want another one taking up space. Get the stuff organized and work with your dad. His job is to teach you things you need to learn/know in life. We don't know why he said no or what the motivations are.

As was mentioned earlier as well, they naturally go through their life cycle in a year and you can grow them when the season is suited for it if nothing else. The ones that last longer are in good conditions with regular feeding/maintenance.

I agree COMPLETELY except for I don't think it's right for parents to restrict children's hobbies, especially if they could make a good living off of it in the future, but I understand not letting them if they don't clean up the messes it makes, don't take care of them, or if it's inappropriate for their age or if it's illegal (obviously) but at the end of the day it's the parents choice and you have to respect that.

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Yeah, I definitely agree they shouldn't be discouraged from hobbies. That's vital for development and a healthy psyche. We all need an escape from the day to day. That is why I wanted to touch on the dynamic and the situation there, or lack thereof because we don't really have any context here. I mean if he is hulking out on his dad because he wants something then I absolutely see the dad's point of view. Same thing if he's getting these on a whim and then neglects them after the fact or leaves the materials scattered everywhere. I'm not saying that's the case Josh but the fact is we don't know and you're asking us our opinion of the situation.

If we're talking in general, if you were to keep your grow space/room in order, keep your hobby out of the way and have the means, space, and knowledge to take care of them and do, I wouldn't see why that would be an issue. I wouldn't see a reason to discourage that or "flex" on you. We don't know your home life and it isn't really a subject for this forum. For that reason, I'm just going saying that you need to have a real discussion and find a real compromise. Negotiate for something you want and offer something in return. He doesn't need to give you what you want. It's really up to you to show you are serious about it. Keeping your promises as well. If you convince him with a deal and then backpedal, he'll lose trust in your word and you'll find yourself in these situations over and over. Speak to him with respect and with your emotions in check as well. "You attract more bees with honey than vinegar." You will go further with your dad if you speak politely from a real place of respect than shouting about how it isn't right or whatever else goes on.

Apollyon wrote:Yeah, I definitely agree they shouldn't be discouraged from hobbies. That's vital for development and a healthy psyche. We all need an escape from the day to day. That is why I wanted to touch on the dynamic and the situation there, or lack thereof because we don't really have any context here. I mean if he is hulking out on his dad because he wants something then I absolutely see the dad's point of view. Same thing if he's getting these on a whim and then neglects them after the fact or leaves the materials scattered everywhere. I'm not saying that's the case Josh but the fact is we don't know and you're asking us our opinion of the situation.

If we're talking in general, if you were to keep your grow space/room in order, keep your hobby out of the way and have the means, space, and knowledge to take care of them and do, I wouldn't see why that would be an issue. I wouldn't see a reason to discourage that or "flex" on you. We don't know your home life and it isn't really a subject for this forum. For that reason, I'm just going saying that you need to have a real discussion and find a real compromise. Negotiate for something you want and offer something in return. He doesn't need to give you what you want. It's really up to you to show you are serious about it. Keeping your promises as well. If you convince him with a deal and then backpedal, he'll lose trust in your word and you'll find yourself in these situations over and over. Speak to him with respect and with your emotions in check as well. "You attract more bees with honey than vinegar." You will go further with your dad if you speak politely from a real place of respect than shouting about how it isn't right or whatever else goes on.

Couldn't have said it better myself.

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banana time!!!

It may be possible, sometime in those moments when you are getting along well together, to try to get him interested in the hobby. If those moments are few and far between, try to create them yourself (some suggestions from the other responses would be excellent for this).

While I do hear what you're saying, I also have to agree with the others -- dad's house, dad's rules. That is the long, short, beginning and end of it. Someday, if you choose to have kids, you will be making the rules of your household. Your kids may not like it. And they don't have to -- they just have to follow them or move out and get their own place.

Determining what criteria your dad would require to allow you to keep this or other plants is a reasonable solution. However, do realize there might not be negotiable ground. And if there isn't, accept it without griping or whining at him. Will it suck? Yes. But as long as he is paying the bills, it is his right to say what will and won't be allowed under his roof.

It is kind of a tragedy for all parties involved when someone's talents and hobbies are stifled.

When I was a child my dad mocked me for growing "flowers" and called me a f@g. In the best case scenario an individual would be able to explain how this hobby can turn financially profitable with good cultivation skills and the necessary greenhouse space, and that supporting the hobby would be a huge benefit and the parent could even take a chunk if the profit, any better yet have satisfaction that their child grew up into someone who knows how to be responsible and has a horticultural background to fall back on if SHTF. Instead in the worst case scenario you get someone with extreme self confidence issues.

In my case if I had a greenhouse I could be one of those famous plant youtubers and have a nice background for videos and room to propagate for ebay sales, but instead I am a loser who lives in their parent's basement because my entire life my hobbies were mocked and I was constantly asked if I am a retard with down syndrome. It is great poetic justice because now everyone who is involved in my life going to be on a miserable downhill spiral into poverty and insanity since I am a glorified parasite at this point.

That's why I recommend establishing dominance with a fist fight. It is biologically sound and I am a certified biologist. However due to brain damage from years of trauma I am also certifiably insane so you probably shouldn't listen to me.

p.s. subscribe to youtube.com/HelixPlants
ESKEETIT, gucci gang x7