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Re: I NEED HELP NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes I typed this out of anger

Posted: Wed Nov 25, 2020 3:11 pm
by Jaker00
SundewWolf wrote:It is kind of a tragedy for all parties involved when someone's talents and hobbies are stifled.

When I was a child my dad mocked me for growing "flowers" and called me a f@g. In the best case scenario an individual would be able to explain how this hobby can turn financially profitable with good cultivation skills and the necessary greenhouse space, and that supporting the hobby would be a huge benefit and the parent could even take a chunk if the profit, any better yet have satisfaction that their child grew up into someone who knows how to be responsible and has a horticultural background to fall back on if SHTF. Instead in the worst case scenario you get someone with extreme self confidence issues.

In my case if I had a greenhouse I could be one of those famous plant youtubers and have a nice background for videos and room to propagate for ebay sales, but instead I am a loser who lives in their parent's basement because my entire life my hobbies were mocked and I was constantly asked if I am a retard with down syndrome. It is great poetic justice because now everyone who is involved in my life going to be on a miserable downhill spiral into poverty and insanity since I am a glorified parasite at this point.

That's why I recommend establishing dominance with a fist fight. It is biologically sound and I am a certified biologist. However due to brain damage from years of trauma I am also certifiably insane so you probably shouldn't listen to me.

p.s. subscribe to youtube.com/HelixPlants
ESKEETIT, gucci gang x7
They're a biologist so they could be right, but they're most definitely insane, so I don't think you should take their advice.

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Re: I NEED HELP NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes I typed this out of anger

Posted: Wed Nov 25, 2020 3:34 pm
by jose
SundewWolf wrote: Wed Nov 25, 2020 3:51 am It is kind of a tragedy for all parties involved when someone's talents and hobbies are stifled.

When I was a child my dad mocked me for growing "flowers" and called me a f@g. In the best case scenario an individual would be able to explain how this hobby can turn financially profitable with good cultivation skills and the necessary greenhouse space, and that supporting the hobby would be a huge benefit and the parent could even take a chunk if the profit, any better yet have satisfaction that their child grew up into someone who knows how to be responsible and has a horticultural background to fall back on if SHTF. Instead in the worst case scenario you get someone with extreme self confidence issues.

In my case if I had a greenhouse I could be one of those famous plant youtubers and have a nice background for videos and room to propagate for ebay sales, but instead I am a loser who lives in their parent's basement because my entire life my hobbies were mocked and I was constantly asked if I am a retard with down syndrome. It is great poetic justice because now everyone who is involved in my life going to be on a miserable downhill spiral into poverty and insanity since I am a glorified parasite at this point.

That's why I recommend establishing dominance with a fist fight. It is biologically sound and I am a certified biologist. However due to brain damage from years of trauma I am also certifiably insane so you probably shouldn't listen to me.

p.s. subscribe to youtube.com/HelixPlants
ESKEETIT, gucci gang x7
I guess this is rated PG...???

Re: I NEED HELP NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes I typed this out of anger

Posted: Wed Nov 25, 2020 3:59 pm
by ChefDean
jose wrote: Wed Nov 25, 2020 3:34 pm
SundewWolf wrote: Wed Nov 25, 2020 3:51 am It is kind of a tragedy for all parties involved when someone's talents and hobbies are stifled.

When I was a child my dad mocked me for growing "flowers" and called me a f@g. In the best case scenario an individual would be able to explain how this hobby can turn financially profitable with good cultivation skills and the necessary greenhouse space, and that supporting the hobby would be a huge benefit and the parent could even take a chunk if the profit, any better yet have satisfaction that their child grew up into someone who knows how to be responsible and has a horticultural background to fall back on if SHTF. Instead in the worst case scenario you get someone with extreme self confidence issues.

In my case if I had a greenhouse I could be one of those famous plant youtubers and have a nice background for videos and room to propagate for ebay sales, but instead I am a loser who lives in their parent's basement because my entire life my hobbies were mocked and I was constantly asked if I am a retard with down syndrome. It is great poetic justice because now everyone who is involved in my life going to be on a miserable downhill spiral into poverty and insanity since I am a glorified parasite at this point.

That's why I recommend establishing dominance with a fist fight. It is biologically sound and I am a certified biologist. However due to brain damage from years of trauma I am also certifiably insane so you probably shouldn't listen to me.

p.s. subscribe to youtube.com/HelixPlants
ESKEETIT, gucci gang x7
I guess this is rated PG...???
Although dark and unsettling, it is a personal account, perhaps tongue in cheek and satirical, to be taken with a grain of salt. It isn't an attack on another member.

Re: I NEED HELP NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes I typed this out of anger

Posted: Wed Nov 25, 2020 6:52 pm
by jose
Heck guess I’ll tell my personal tale :shock: :?

Re: I NEED HELP NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes I typed this out of anger

Posted: Wed Nov 25, 2020 8:31 pm
by ChefDean
jose wrote: Wed Nov 25, 2020 6:52 pm Heck guess I’ll tell my personal tale :shock: :?
Go for it. However, maybe start a new thread for it unless it ties into the discussion surrounding the original post or a response to it.

Re: I NEED HELP NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes I typed this out of anger

Posted: Wed Nov 25, 2020 8:34 pm
by jose
Hellllllllll no :lol: Keeping that story to myself!

Re: I NEED HELP NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes I typed this out of anger

Posted: Wed Nov 25, 2020 8:58 pm
by Apollyon
It does give perspective even if does sound bleak. It could very well be that the op home environment isn't a great place. That could be a very real possibility. I offered negotiation based off the idea that maybe it's just the natural "teen" development at work. Sometimes though, there isn't a negotiation. I personally didn't want to probe into their home life so I gave a couple general "solutions." I'm sure there are several of us who came from less than ideal scenarios and had to "go against the grain." Ignorance is worse than anything. I particularly feel bad for the one who had one of those insecure dads who believe anything outside of Coors Light and a pool table is for "fags." You gotta do what makes you happy and you're right. You can make a lot of money and the knowledge could get you somewhere if things go to hell. For instance, a lot of people made serious money throughout covid. While the world was shut down, people were selling plants to people trying to keep their sanity by taking on a plant or two for serious cash. Still, I believe I saw one of your videos on the Scott's Disease EX. Don't let that bring you down. If you want to make videos, make them. Don't throw in before you've given yourself a chance to try. Try selling some plants and get savings started to remove yourself from a toxic situation. Try growing smaller ones of value. If you're in a bad spot like that, you can only improve things. But not without trying.

Re: I NEED HELP NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes I typed this out of anger

Posted: Wed Nov 25, 2020 9:09 pm
by Jaker00
Apollyon wrote:It does give perspective even if does sound bleak. It could very well be that the op home environment isn't a great place. That could be a very real possibility. I offered negotiation based off the idea that maybe it's just the natural "teen" development at work. Sometimes though, there isn't a negotiation. I personally didn't want to probe into their home life so I gave a couple general "solutions." I'm sure there are several of us who came from less than ideal scenarios and had to "go against the grain." Ignorance is worse than anything. I particularly feel bad for the one who had one of those insecure dads who believe anything outside of Coors Light and a pool table is for "fags." You gotta do what makes you happy and you're right. You can make a lot of money and the knowledge could get you somewhere if things go to hell. For instance, a lot of people made serious money throughout covid. While the world was shut down, people were selling plants to people trying to keep their sanity by taking on a plant or two for serious cash. Still, I believe I saw one of your videos on the Scott's Disease EX. Don't let that bring you down. If you want to make videos, make them. Don't throw in before you've given yourself a chance to try. Try selling some plants and get savings started to remove yourself from a toxic situation. Try growing smaller ones of value. If you're in a bad spot like that, you can only improve things. But not without trying.
Yes, I have a dad that calls me a "sissy" whenever I do something that isn't seen as "manly" it creates a toxic house and ruins relationships, it's extremely hurtful when your own family insults you for not being their vision of the perfect child, it's probably one of the worst things you can do to a child's emotions.

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Re: I NEED HELP NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes I typed this out of anger

Posted: Sat Nov 28, 2020 1:31 am
by SundewWolf
ChefDean wrote: Although dark and unsettling, it is a personal account, perhaps tongue in cheek and satirical, to be taken with a grain of salt. It isn't an attack on another member.

Re: I NEED HELP NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes I typed this out of anger

Posted: Sat Nov 28, 2020 3:04 am
by Apollyon
Still don't think 27 is too old to begin something. I'm 30 years old and had the same kinds of inner struggles. That's part of the adult experience; reconciling your real and ideal. You may not have a greenhouse though you could make money selling smaller exotic plants. Drosera Gemmae, Pinguiculas, some of your VFT cultivars. I mean if your parents are rough on you I'm sorry(forum won't let me phrase that as I would). You have to just make the best out of a bad situation. Your self respect rebuilds itself as you achieve different successes. Don't throw in the towel before you start the fight. 27 seems old but it really isn't. If you were able to stay off of drugs, then good for you. Seriously. I've seen exactly what drugs will do to people. They've been around my entire life. I'm more at loss for words at how ignorant your folks sound. Self-loathing Americans? Do yourself a solid, get a couple jobs. Buy a couple grow racks and get an apartment. You'll probably find half of your issues disappear immediately and you'll feel a lot better about things. Though I do know where you're at right now and I know the first steps are needlessly difficult. Have to force yourself until you can do it without hating every minute. Idk, I empathize with you to a degree. I didn't have the same exact issues but I found my head in a similar place at different points in my life. I think to some degree, a lot of us have here. The hobby often attracts a certain "type" of people.

As for Josh, I haven't seen him post after this. I'm wondering what happened with that. I'm going to guess that it didn't work out very well though. That's a lot of teenage angst that's going to have to smooth itself out. It's hard listening to people tell you that you're wrong when you're a kid. It's like when our parents told us how wrong we were and didn't believe a word of it. Hopefully they come to an understanding.

Re: I NEED HELP NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes I typed this out of anger

Posted: Sat Nov 28, 2020 3:35 am
by jose
Go camping at National and state parks and wilderness areas. It’s cheap and proven to be more effective at mental rehabilitation than anything the modern medical field has come up with

Re: I NEED HELP NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes I typed this out of anger

Posted: Sat Nov 28, 2020 4:55 am
by SundewWolf
jose wrote:Go camping at National and state parks and wilderness areas. It’s cheap and proven to be more effective at mental rehabilitation than anything the modern medical field has come up with

Re: I NEED HELP NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes I typed this out of anger

Posted: Sat Nov 28, 2020 5:03 am
by SundewWolf
Apollyon wrote:You may not have a greenhouse though you could make money selling smaller exotic plants. Drosera Gemmae, Pinguiculas, some of your VFT cultivars. Do yourself a solid, get a couple jobs. Buy a couple grow racks and get an apartment. You'll probably find half of your issues disappear immediately and you'll feel a lot better about things.
I feel what you're saying with the small steps, but for a crazy person drinking absinthe 5 times a week it's much too late for that. I am very close to selling every plant I have and fully dedicating my entire life to being a horse trainer. It's not a complete loss since I have all the knowledge I learned about cultivation over the past decade, it's just become a ball and chain needing lots of yard space. I could move into an apartment but what would I do with the 100+ carni plants and 30+ outdoor bonsai and pre-bonsai trees. My problem/useful talent is hyper-obsession over my hobbies, only issue is if I have 8 different hobbies it becomes and overwhelming nutcase project. If I throw evertyhing into horses I will achieve what I want. Just a tough bullet to bite realize i am going to have to abandon everything else. I mean I dont have to sell ALL my plants, however I am an extremist so one day soon I will.

Re: I NEED HELP NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes I typed this out of anger

Posted: Sat Nov 28, 2020 5:25 am
by Apollyon
Ahhh someone else works with bonsai trees. I don't know how big your plants are or what types but a couple racks should support a decent amount of your plants. I'm talking more about the 4-5 shelf bakers racks and running some light fixtures. I have the same problem. I focus on something to the point it's almost an obsession before moving onto the next.

You may need to downsize but you shouldn't eliminate it entirely. It'd be an impulsive choice you'll likely regret. If that's the direction you want to go with animals, that's not a bad choice. But you should try to find a way to balance the two. I know personally, I look forward to the progress I see with the plants are cracking the "mystery" for healthy growth. I have a bunch of trees outside as well and have been debating downsizing. No "finished" trees, a lot of pre-bonsai and a ficus benjamina 'too little' that's come a long way.

That is the gist of it though; one progressive step at a time. Reinforcing yourself with small success. You could likely make decent money, particularly if you tried to move "prebonsai" a plant cutting instantly goes up 5x in value. I've seen some ridiculous stuff being moved for 50+ essentially a twig with a couple of nodes that may have been bent but probably not.